I'm not sure what gets the credit: the early morning meditation, the exercise routine that follows, or the new vitamins.
Years ago, I participated in guided meditation classes in a granola-y,-Every-day-is- Earth-Day,-can't-we-all-just-get-along part of town. As much as I loved that neighborhood, those were some of the longest evenings, where time ticked...ticked...ticked by so slowly in that blank, still room. Emptying and quieting one's mind required inner discipline I didn't possess then, and wasn't all that interested in obtaining. Frankly, I spent more time trying to catch other people's eye, trying to make them break pose and laugh out loud.
In any case, meditation this time around feels more centering and not such a power struggle.
All this healthy stuff means I've been making some other choices, too, like separating from some fruitless activities unworthy of my time and effort. It's funny: once you do rake out the cobwebbed debris of old patterns and mind games, suddenly the calendar cracks wide, and expands for more fun, enlightening stuff.
Lately, I've been building into the workday little bits of things that make ME happy: photography, film editing, writing, daydreaming, reading, visiting, music, laughing.
I've gone out of my way, in small, but significant steps, to actually live out what I believe deep down, which is that life is good. Not perfect, but good.
I'm thanking God more for the blue sky, and the four hundred million other things I take for granted. I'm trying to be thankful for the things that are now, the things that were, and the things that are to come.
(Yep, it's a long list.)
This happy burst of energy, however long it lasts, is welcome, and I hope it stays a while.
Be well.
Thursday, September 9, 2010
